i think that im possibly the greatest idiot in the world. who else falls asleep with a kopiko candy and end up waking up at 3+ feeling very energetic due to the caffine.damned. ahahs. and who blogs at 6.05 am in the morning. yay! todae is the official last day of school. sounds really good. but then. unfortunately. i have about an entire week of lessons!damned. and i jus decorated my wallet to make it look like a bee. interesting. halloween. yipee! bleahs. another weird dream. the no. of weird dreams i am getting is honestly increasing. and worse. this one was set in the school and i dreamt of so many people. weird. doinks.doinks. anyone knows where i can get 400 pencils at a really cheap prize? its for the cca fair. i think art club came up with great suggestions this year. we rock! and our class got first for the mini drama! all thanks to our brilliant actresses. [ dey are going to make it big someday ] and last but not least. hehes. the costume commitee [aka my commitee] for the brilliant costumes. ahahs. thick skin! but i think we did well. and there was really tough competition cos every class's one was equally good!
feli jus complained that my blog is boring. hrmphs. spice up my blog!! -adds spices- sniff sniff. not working. sighs. being really lame! hahas. my brother brought home another fallen birdie from his school. its a mynah! and it looks really dumb ! so cute. i am naming it NEMO ! yay. bahs. had lots of lessons today! -mentally exhausted- grrs. i sound like a big bimbo. our class drama is going to be so exciting. teehees. and we're doing the costumes. great rites! i'm excited to doll steffi up into maria. ahahas. and once again im out of the depressed and bad mood zone and crossing the bridge towards the happy! zone. be myself again. i just love to be myself. and vote for candice for head prefect! muahahs. JUICE rocks.
My inner child is sixteen years old!
Life's not fair! It's never been fair, but while
adults might just accept that, I know
something's gotta change. And it's gonna
change, just as soon as I become an adult and
get some power of my own.
How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla
i've got glittery starry toe nails!!! hees. they are just too cute! i'm glad that i have people that cheers me up! like my cute cousins! and my grandma forgot my name. and couldn't recognise me! -poots- no fun. i wanna haf a halloween costume party but is it possible to organise a party in about 4 days? -wonders- and i dun think people will come. so shall live thru another halloween without a party! yesterday i was feeling so sad! but thanks to anthea who made me smile with just her silly smile. you made my day!
spent another night tossing and turning around. hate it. i really do. i'll do anything if it is going to help me to stop thinking about stuff. i am not in the mood to blog. i only want to cry. but crying is not going to change anything so whats the point. i shall volunteer myself at SPCA during the holidays. anyone interested to join me. its pretty much the only thing that i feel like doing during the holidays. help out. change the world. teach me how to when i can't even change the way i feel. and to anyone who is close and cares enough, i need a little bit of help to protect me from myself.
feeling really irritated now. blardie sister is watching an irritating vcd that squeaks about how many times in a minute. as in the vcd is sort of faulty and keeps stoning that sort of thing. very irritated by the sound. then my internet is damned screwerd up and the pages are not loading! can you imagine trying to surf blogs and the irritating thing does not load?! i have to reconnect it like how many million times before it can fuction. my mom keeps yelling at me this couple of days and i myself have been pissing her off too. gees. i'm in the sort of mood where i should go to a playground and jus swing the time away. perhaps i will.
there was this 'let's play' session sort of thing in school today. somehow i ended up in traditional games. but supporting and cheering on people was far more fun than the stupid games. screamed so much! after that there was the prefects campaign thing. i'm in candice's campaign team!
the emptiness that i feel when you are not around is killing me.
the emptiness that i feel when you are not around is killing me.
i found a lizard murdered in the study room. 7 to 8 cm long [i sort of measured alrites!] lying on its back, in a very awkward position. right eye still open. a left over head of a giant ant of some sort left next to it. time of death must have been between 7 am to 3pm now, seeing that my maid cleans the room before 7am. conclusion there must be some big creature that could have caused the death without even a scar.-scared to death- hmms. hees. freaking myself out with the investigation and being bo liaos. i have officially no tv shows to watch, no good books to read and nothing to do online. so i can jus totallie sit at home and be a freak investigating the death of a lizard. great. >.< damned. i suddenli find my life meaningful once again. jus being with people makes me really happie and i realized that no matter what my friends and family will always be with me. feel comforted by the thought. -smiles- thanks. maybe i should really think about my own vocation, after so many many vocation talks in church.
got all of my papers baq. overall i think i improved. and i passed my chemistry and e maths! frm F9 to C5 and C6!yay! happie. and i actuallie passed my art paper. -wonders- i was expecting to fail it. hmms. lalas. such a hot dae. perfect for sleeping! which is what i'm goanna do in a while. i jus lyk breaks alrites! -smiles-
went for bufffet lunch today with my family. yum yum. ate so much! then aft dat me mom and sis went to suntec and shopped for qt a while larhs. met up with my dad and brother. after dat went to bugis junction and bought alot of stuff. hees.so fun. which means i spent about 4 + hour shopping. fun fun! finallie got myself a new bag and couple of tops. couldn't eat dinner jus now cos i ate too much during lunch. hrmphs. i am totallie enjoying myself. dun wanna tink abt wad will happen on mondae after wong gives baq our paper. gees. dun wanna fail.-prays-
dreams that are not turned into reality continue to be dreams.
just realised something after browsing some blogs. my life is not meaningful. not the slightest bit. everyone seems to have someone, something, dreams, hopes, wishes and even problems to think about. brood over. smile over. but me? i'm living everyday as though i am passing the levels of a game one by one. without even feeling and understanding what the entire game is all about. and in the end, after the game is over all i get is a empty non-significant nothing. i need to find out what my life is going to be about.
dreams that are not turned into reality continue to be dreams.
just realised something after browsing some blogs. my life is not meaningful. not the slightest bit. everyone seems to have someone, something, dreams, hopes, wishes and even problems to think about. brood over. smile over. but me? i'm living everyday as though i am passing the levels of a game one by one. without even feeling and understanding what the entire game is all about. and in the end, after the game is over all i get is a empty non-significant nothing. i need to find out what my life is going to be about.
todae was reali fun. went to meet carolyn janice and nat in the morning. den we went to eat at e long john silver near p.s. we were going to go over to paradiz center dere but it started raining so heavily. so we walked ard a bit. couldn't take the cold so we ask some office ppl for some old newspapers den ran all the way to paradiz center. it was so wet! we were soaked frm head to toe. hees. slippers was totalli full of water. den hair all wet. haha. den we had to go to blow dry our hair and clothes in e toilet! looked lyk jus finished showering. aft dat went to e k-box. damned fun! screaming our heads off lyk crazy. hahas. fun fun fun!! met so many pple.my sister.anthea.candice.and a lot of other people. happie dae! fine dat was crappy. -smiles-
oh and if nobodie noticed. e doll joy is new and freshly made! it was supposed to be expressing my feelings aft e exams. turned out rather cute and wild!
oh and if nobodie noticed. e doll joy is new and freshly made! it was supposed to be expressing my feelings aft e exams. turned out rather cute and wild!
i am free! the exams are over!!! so happie! i'm high on life! -muacks.
i jus hate it when ppl blow their top and vent their godamned anger at me jus becos someone else made them angrie. lyk totallie screw. pisses me off lyk hell. using my dad's laptop now. researching fer e art exam tmr. last paper. and after dat i'll be free! found a reali cool looking snake head. reali nasty and evil face. cool. :D
hmms. just got home aft a long long stressful day i spent at in the art room (frm 11am to 5pm) so exhuasting. and worst i came up with nothing good. grrs. even had to bring work home to do. think im goanna die die die tmr fer e paper. sighs. qt entertaing aft though. e 7 of the art ppl bonded! muahahas. v. lame. chinese paper todae was alrite i guess. hope i can maintain my grades. im totallie looking forward to tmr afternoon aft e paper. muahahas. exciting. -smiles.
<<>>???What Kind Of Angel R You???<<>>( Anime Pics )
brought to you by Quizilla
hmms. me? so cute! >.<
A GIRLY-GIRL. You dont have a lot of self-esteem
and people are always bringing you down for
being sad. What do they know, anyway? You feel
like youre too mature for your age and are
frustrated by the trend-followers who refuse to
accept you because youre not like them.
Your virtues: Intelligence, understanding nature,
modesty.
Your flaws: Lack of social life, inferiority
complex, timidity.
What kind of girl are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
ooh. me? girly? hmms. -scratch head-
<<>>???What Kind Of Angel R You???<<>>( Anime Pics )
brought to you by Quizilla
hmms. me? so cute! >.<
A GIRLY-GIRL. You dont have a lot of self-esteem
and people are always bringing you down for
being sad. What do they know, anyway? You feel
like youre too mature for your age and are
frustrated by the trend-followers who refuse to
accept you because youre not like them.
Your virtues: Intelligence, understanding nature,
modesty.
Your flaws: Lack of social life, inferiority
complex, timidity.
What kind of girl are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
ooh. me? girly? hmms. -scratch head-
jus ate up 2 whole crabs. yum yum. my mom cooks good! now my fingers are aching frm attacking them and pulling the flesh out of the shell. -spelch- hees. supposed to be studyin chinese now. but not reali in the mood. in a while i guess. wonder y im feeling reali depressed this few wks. hope i get over it aft e exams. den can go and play. shall take neos with my sister. hmms. i like being happie. made this for self-motivation.
i find it really ironic why it is so simple to explain life to someone else but difficult when it comes to living it yourself. i think that i have wasted much of my time doing things that i feel are important but when i look back and think, these things are just a total waste of time. bleahs. feelin sort of weird right now. as always. its a nice saturday morning and still somehow i have to let it go by wasting it on studying. the only time where i can be myself is late at night in bed. the rest of the 24 hours is spend on meaningless things and much as i am against it, i feel that i'm being shaped into a typical singaporean.
somewhere out there's someone who dreams of your smile, and finds in your
presence that life is worth while, so when you are lonely, remember it's
true: somebody, somewhere is thinking of you*
somewhere out there's someone who dreams of your smile, and finds in your
presence that life is worth while, so when you are lonely, remember it's
true: somebody, somewhere is thinking of you*
On the last day before Christmas, I hurried to go to the supermarket
to buy the remaining of the gift I didn't manage to buy earlier. When I
saw all the people there, I started to complain to myself: "It is going to
take forever here and I still have so many other places to go. "Christmas
really is getting more and more annoying every year. How I
wish I could just lie down, go to sleep and only wake up after it..."
Nonetheless, I made my way to the toy section, and there started to
curse the prices, wondering if after all kids really play with such
expensive toys. While looking in the toy section, I noticed a small boy
of about 5 years old, pressing a doll against his chest. He kept on
touching the hair of the doll and looked so sad. I wondered who this
doll was for. Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him:
'Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?' The old lady replied:
'You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'
Then she asked him to stay there for 5 minutes while she went to look
around. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in
his hand. Finally, I started to walk towards him and I asked him who he
wanted to give this doll to.
'It is the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for this
Christmas. She was so sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.'
I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus will bring it to her after all,
and not to worry But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus cannot bring
it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mother so that she
can give it to her when she goes there.' His eyes were so sad while saying
this. 'My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mummy will also go
to see God very soon, so I thought that she could take the doll with
her to give it to my sister.
My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said:
'I told daddy to tell mummy not to go yet. I asked him to wait until I
came back from the supermarket. Then he showed me a very nice photo of
him where he was laughing. He then told me:
'I also want mummy to take this photo with her so that she will not
forget me. I love my mummy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me but
daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister. Then he
looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
I quickly reached for my wallet and took a few notes and said to the
boy.
'What if we checked again, just in case if you have enough money?'
'Ok' he said. 'I hope that I have enough.'
I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to
count it.
There was enough for the doll, and even some left over.
The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money'
Then he looked at me and added:
'I asked yesterday before I went to sleep for God to make sure I have
enough money to buy this doll so that mummy can give it to my sister.
He heard me. I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my
mummy, but didn't dare to ask God too much. But He gave me enough to
buy the doll and the white rose.'
'You know, my mummy loves white roses'
A few minutes later, the old lady came back again and I left with my
trolley.
I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when started.
I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local
newspaper article 2 days ago, which mentioned of a drunk man in a truck
who hit a car where there was one young lady and a little girl. The
little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical
state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the
life-assisting machine, because the young lady would not be able to get
out of the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?
Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read that the
young lady had passed away. I couldn't stop myself and went to buy a bunch
of white roses and I went to the mortuary where the body of the young
woman was exposed for people to see and make last wish before burial. She
was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with
the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left
the place crying, feeling that my life had been changed forever.
The love that this little boy had for his mother and his sister is
still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a
drunk man had taken all this away from him.
i think everibodie's read this storie before its reali meaningful... and ppl shld learn to treasure whatever they have and live their life the best way they can live it... real sweet. and check this out. reali sweet bit of thg too. smiles- r
lit was fine todae i guess. but wished i studied earlier then i cld have done betta. feeling sorta empty and hollow inside. sighs.
+ would you lie to everyone else and end up hurting yourself or would you tell them the truth and end up hurting them?
to buy the remaining of the gift I didn't manage to buy earlier. When I
saw all the people there, I started to complain to myself: "It is going to
take forever here and I still have so many other places to go. "Christmas
really is getting more and more annoying every year. How I
wish I could just lie down, go to sleep and only wake up after it..."
Nonetheless, I made my way to the toy section, and there started to
curse the prices, wondering if after all kids really play with such
expensive toys. While looking in the toy section, I noticed a small boy
of about 5 years old, pressing a doll against his chest. He kept on
touching the hair of the doll and looked so sad. I wondered who this
doll was for. Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him:
'Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?' The old lady replied:
'You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'
Then she asked him to stay there for 5 minutes while she went to look
around. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in
his hand. Finally, I started to walk towards him and I asked him who he
wanted to give this doll to.
'It is the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for this
Christmas. She was so sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.'
I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus will bring it to her after all,
and not to worry But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus cannot bring
it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mother so that she
can give it to her when she goes there.' His eyes were so sad while saying
this. 'My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mummy will also go
to see God very soon, so I thought that she could take the doll with
her to give it to my sister.
My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said:
'I told daddy to tell mummy not to go yet. I asked him to wait until I
came back from the supermarket. Then he showed me a very nice photo of
him where he was laughing. He then told me:
'I also want mummy to take this photo with her so that she will not
forget me. I love my mummy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me but
daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister. Then he
looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
I quickly reached for my wallet and took a few notes and said to the
boy.
'What if we checked again, just in case if you have enough money?'
'Ok' he said. 'I hope that I have enough.'
I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to
count it.
There was enough for the doll, and even some left over.
The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money'
Then he looked at me and added:
'I asked yesterday before I went to sleep for God to make sure I have
enough money to buy this doll so that mummy can give it to my sister.
He heard me. I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my
mummy, but didn't dare to ask God too much. But He gave me enough to
buy the doll and the white rose.'
'You know, my mummy loves white roses'
A few minutes later, the old lady came back again and I left with my
trolley.
I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when started.
I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local
newspaper article 2 days ago, which mentioned of a drunk man in a truck
who hit a car where there was one young lady and a little girl. The
little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical
state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the
life-assisting machine, because the young lady would not be able to get
out of the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?
Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read that the
young lady had passed away. I couldn't stop myself and went to buy a bunch
of white roses and I went to the mortuary where the body of the young
woman was exposed for people to see and make last wish before burial. She
was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with
the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left
the place crying, feeling that my life had been changed forever.
The love that this little boy had for his mother and his sister is
still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a
drunk man had taken all this away from him.
i think everibodie's read this storie before its reali meaningful... and ppl shld learn to treasure whatever they have and live their life the best way they can live it... real sweet. and check this out. reali sweet bit of thg too. smiles- r
lit was fine todae i guess. but wished i studied earlier then i cld have done betta. feeling sorta empty and hollow inside. sighs.
+ would you lie to everyone else and end up hurting yourself or would you tell them the truth and end up hurting them?
Part of me laughs (ooh),
Part of me cries,
Part of me wants to question why (question why),
Why is there joy,
Why is there pain,
Why is there sunshine than the rain,
One day you're here (one day),
Next you are gone (next you are gone),
No matter what we must go on,
Just keep the faith and let love lead the way,
Everthing will work out fine,
If you let love, love lead the way
exams are just around the corner. we will make it through. dont worry.
good luck you guys :D
A coward gets scared and quits. A hero gets scared, but still goes on.
- unknown
and for myself, i quote from 12th night. "O time thou must untangle this, it is too hard a knot for me to untie"
good luck you guys :D
A coward gets scared and quits. A hero gets scared, but still goes on.
- unknown
and for myself, i quote from 12th night. "O time thou must untangle this, it is too hard a knot for me to untie"