insecurities of a starfish

urghs. im still thinking - one month
a nice note to end off the last day of school
for that three seconds
it felt right
i was on cloud9
and i wished time would freeze
but i cant help but think
that im choosing to not think deeply
cos if i just try to think more
it just shows me what you truly think
which seriously isnt very favourable):

today was fun.
my toes hurt though
i think we walked a million miles
but food-wise.
subway and yami yogurt
both in a day
food paradise! (:

Don't need a rocket man
To help me touch the sky
I don't need to fly a plane
To get this high
Don't need to hitch a ride
When I could run a million miles
Yes I would, just to see you smile

footprints in the sand Saturday, May 28, 2005

i love my sister
for buying for me
the dry version of
my favourite sng food!
even though it was me who made her
still she remembered the chilli
and the no bean sprouts thing!!
:D

i cut my hair
thankfully
it doesnt look like a disaster
or some freak accident
its umm. OKAY

my gp ishh no gooooodd
cant really get things into my head
sleepy /:
i hope tomorrow turns out okay.
i just realised something
tomorrow we break for holidays
even with extra lessons
most classes will have it on different days
different times.
oh godness
i'm going to die
one month?!

sheeshh.
im going to be one lonely
AND sad girl this holiday /:

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

footprints in the sand Thursday, May 26, 2005

i made lemon cupcakes
they kinda spilled over the cups
so ermm
ugly cupcakes!
and i burned my finger ):
i think this is the end of my
non existence baking career
apparently i cant even bake
cake mixes?!
cos i kinda burnt them
-sheepish face-

the truth that hits me
between the eyes
you're way too good
its just going to have to be
me and my pink pig forever then
i wanna cry ):

footprints in the sand Monday, May 23, 2005

its retarded
seeing how im always
like always
dreaming of the impossible
and at times literally dreaming

ive been having super odd dreams
they confuse me
ive always believed that dreams
reflect your deepest desires
but they seem so cocked up
im not so sure

and then i stone and think
ponder over each moment
and i know
for every moment i remain silent
thats another second wasted
i dont stand a chance

Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven
Will it be the same
If I saw you in heaven
I must be strong, and carry on
Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven

footprints in the sand Sunday, May 22, 2005

10 REALLY RANDOM THINGS ABOUT ME
01. i like fat pink cute pigs
02. i've got the longest legs in the world -sniggers
03. im a little mentally unstable
04. i like looking at people's hands and feet
05. i cant sleep without hugging something
06. my hair simply doesnt get messed up much
07. i can sleep in class without getting discovered
08. i dislike eating sausages
09. i've got a ball face
10. i named my ipod mini mini me

9 WAYS TO WIN MY HEART
01. cute smile (:
02. goofyness and retardedness
03. smsing me randomly
04. sweet talk
05. lots of communication
06. play with my hair
07. laughter
08. hand holding!
09. do retarded things together

8 THINGS I CARRY/WEAR EVERYDAY
01. blue pouch
02. handphone
03. glasses
04. inhaler
05. ermm clothes
06. earrings
07. necklace with a star!
08. big smile :D

7 THINGS THAT ANNOY ME
01. bad attitude
02. racism
03. violence especially against helpless girls
04. being ignored for no reason
05. headaches
06. animal abuse
07. inflexible , outdated rules
08. unreasonable people

6 PLACES I'VE VISITED OR INTEND TO
01. new zealand
02. australia
03. china
04. hawaii
05. alaska
06. venus (:

5 THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE
01. sing a love song to my lover
02. wear one of those mascot suits and walk ard
03. go on a ice cream and cake marathon (:
04. go for a makeover and scare everyone
05. have breakfast in bed

4 THINGS I'M AFRAID OF
01. supernatural powers
02. cockroaches
03. being alone in a dark place
04. getting in deep shit trouble

3 THINGS I DO EVERYDAY
01. sing
02. stare at the mirror
03. ~~stone~~pebble!

2 THINGS I'M TRYING NOT TO DO NOW
01. hang my computer
02. go on a crash diet

1 PERSON I WANT TO SEE NOW
01. i dont mind hearing from you too. hahh (:

footprints in the sand Friday, May 20, 2005

it was a beautiful day
i wished that time could have frozen
and that things will always be that way

footprints in the sand Thursday, May 19, 2005

slumber party was fun
i think we killed feli with the mess
we made though!
campbell soup with macaroni
was yummmy
okay angels hair spagetthi
wasnt too bad too
just that it was skinny.
like beehoon.
imagine beehoon in sauce
ahahahahs
and im surprise i didnt die of
like diahorrea
considering who cooked it!
and also considering
how much detergent
ive probably consumed
from the way some people
washed the dishes
ahahhahas.
ahemm PANDA
im terribly unproud to say that
out of the 2 days
i only like managed to get an hr plus of work done
not effective at all!!
i slept with my arms crossed most of the night
in fear of whacking carolyn in my sleep
and i was cold /:

thanks for all the fun times
another precious memory
to add to my
big jar of memories in my mind!
funky! :D

Why are there so many
songs about rainbows
and what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions,
but only illusions,
and rainbows have
nothing to hide.
So we've been told and
some choose to believe it.
I know they're wrong,
wait and see.
Someday we'll find it,
the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

footprints in the sand Monday, May 16, 2005

i think i get mood swingy
im either happy like delighted
or sad and utterly depressed.
and i get stoned.
its like just 3 moods i can swing from
happy, sad, no emotion.

i wish upon the morning star
the only one i spot from afar
i wish for happy days
sipping coffee in tiny cafes
i wish for beauty
eyes that are a little frosty
and above all
i wish for clues
that lead me to you

footprints in the sand Thursday, May 12, 2005

i miss a certain group of people
like damn a lot.
when i eat fish and chips in school
i think about our icelemontea mix sprite
and when i sit at the grandstand stoning
i think about our dumb recess days
wrecking havoc (:
and then the outings, the gatherings
the parties.
jepenga
tocks loves -

Kiss me once for the good times, baby
Kiss me twice for good bye
You can't help how you don't feel
And it does'nt matter why

footprints in the sand Tuesday, May 10, 2005

im grateful today
for people who cheer me up
and never fails to make my day
a wonderful experience.
its in the little things,
the small actions
that you truly see the love
and joy that youve got!

i think im a silly person
whats up with me and pocky
ahahhas. (:
okay point here is
pocky is being used as a pun

my mum was telling me
that im not fat
i told her
im not fat, im just not thin enough
damn to the world thats being
controlled by mass media
much as i acknowledge fact that
fat is subjective
but in this terribly superficial world
and society
thats the way life is! /:
it annoys me. but whatever
ive got to do something
abt my weight.
RAAH.

A good speech is like a girl's skirt
Short enough to hold your attention
Long enough to cover the areas of interest

footprints in the sand Sunday, May 08, 2005

and like a whirlwind
the thought suddenly hits me
everyone has moved on
all except for me
who's still firmly rooted
to the ground
and when it gets quiet
and everyone's silent
i realise that
its still just me

footprints in the sand Thursday, May 05, 2005

i seem to be living in this
whole repetitive cycle everyday
its kinda vicious
seeing how my everyday is
almost the same!
BOREDOM!
the same wake up,
lessons, home thing
is beginning to bore me out
i need more interesting things
or people :D
to spice up my life!!
ahahahs.

There's a light in your eyes that I used to see
And a song in the words that you spoke to me
Was I wrong to believe in your melody
There's a light in your eyes
Did you leave that light burning for me
Should I keep on waiting or
does love keep on fading away

footprints in the sand

for a few moments
my mind went wild
with the irrational possibilities
and i just wanted to cry

Suddenly I was feeling depressed
I was utterly and totally stressed
Do you know you made me cry
Do you know you made me die

footprints in the sand Monday, May 02, 2005

my dad just woke me up
to ask if i had been sleeping very long
and if i wanted to wake up
grumbles -
now i cant get back to sleep
HRMPF
all because he wanted to go eat prata
and theres no one else in the house
so he had to wake me from my sweet slumber
i didnt eat prata
and forbid him to go eat too
HEE (:
if i actually will physically rot
by saying that im rotting at home
i think i would already be a pile of dust on the ground
complete rottiness!
trying to imagine how
im going to have to kill another day
like this tomorrow /:

Fly me to the moon
Let me sing among those stars
Let me see what spring is like
On jupiter and mars
In other words, hold my hand
In other words, baby kiss me

footprints in the sand Sunday, May 01, 2005